What should i do if i want to commit suicide?

I hate my life so much! I wake up every morning and going threw the day with suicidle thoughts in my mind. I am the outcast at my school and am always by myself. My suicidle thoughts have been going on for about a week now and i don't know what to do anymore. I suffer from bipolar, depression, adhd, and ocd. I am so worthless and a big mistake god should have never even put me here on earth because all i do is mess things up. I am never really truly happy anymore. My life has gone to h*** and i want the pain to all go away and i just want to die really bad. I cut and i want to pop pills. No body would even care if i was gone. My parents hate me and i am all alone in life. I want to just end it all tonight right now i wouldn't even be missed because no body cares they would just laugh when they found out. I lost the one i love by stupid mistakes and everything is my fault. I don't know what to do anymore i don't want the number for a hotline because i already tried to call it and it didn't help. I need someone really bad i want to commit suicide please email me at ashlynnaaby@yahoo.com or if you even care to reply to this then just give your email on the answer if you want but right now i am on a serious suicide rampage and i don't know what to do help!!!!! i want to self injure what do i do?!!!!